Friday, April 27, 2007
AHHHH….. The young and enthusiastic!Here's a truly heartwarming story about the bond formed between a little 5-year-old girl and some construction workers that will make you believethat we all can make a difference when we give a child the gift of our time.A young family moved into a house, next to a vacant lot. One day, a construction crew turned up to start building a house on the empty lot.The young family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and spent much of each day observing the workers.Eventually the construction crew, all of them "gems-in-the-rough," more orless, adopted her as a kind of project mascot. They chatted with her, lether sit with them while they had coffee and lunch breaks, and gave herlittle jobs to do here and there to make her feel important. At the endof the first week, they even presented her with a pay envelope containingten dollars. The little girl took this home to her mother who suggestedthat she take her ten dollars "pay" she'd received to the bank the nextday to start a savings account.When the girl and her mom got to the bank, the teller was equallyimpressed and asked the little girl how she had come by her very own paycheck at such a young age. The little girl proudly replied, "I worked lastweek with a real construction crew building the new house next door tous." "Oh my goodness gracious," said the teller, "and will you be workingon the house again this week, too?" The little girl replied, "I will, if those assholes at Home Depot ever deliver the fuckin' sheet rock."
Posted by mingsworld.com ::
11:05 PM ::
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Thursday, April 19, 2007
Major Water Study At Stanford...
In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists at Stanford have demonstrated that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E.coli) bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of Poop.
However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine (or beer, rum, whiskey or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting.
Remember: Water = Poop Wine = Health
Therefore, it's better to drink lots of wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit.There is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing it as a public service.
Dr James Verminpoo, Phd
Posted by mingsworld.com ::
10:18 PM ::
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Friday, April 13, 2007
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English" .
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where! more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.
Posted by mingsworld.com ::
5:24 PM ::
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Giggles
